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吴念真丨计程车司机的故事<\/h2>

吴念真<\/span> <\/p>

有—天，我去坐计程车。台北市大概七成以上的人都认得我，所以我在台北很守规矩，走路一定靠右边，不会一边走一边抽烟。<\/p>

<\/p>

那个计程车司机在听古典乐，那音乐恰好是我当时唯一能接受、唯一喜欢的肖邦。我很高兴。他从后视镜看到我。我说那是肖邦啊。他说对啊。他很含蓄地说，导演你好，我常常想，如果哪一天碰见你，我一定要讲个故事给你听。我说，好啊，你讲啊。他说，你就当成我自言自语好了。<\/p>

<\/p>

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　　如果老师掉水里了，你会怎么解救他？可能有的同学会这样说：我会游泳，1秒十米不在话下；我会找旁边的好心人帮忙，我会用腰带当绳子，我会打110找警察……
<\/p>

　　其实还有很多的答案，想不想知道各个专业的学生是怎么解救的？一起来看看各专业“大神”们的回答：<\/p><\/blockquote>

　　材料科学学院<\/b><\/p>

\"640.webp.jpg\"
<\/b><\/p>

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> 如果老师掉水里了，你会怎么解救他？可能有的同学会这样说：我会游泳，1秒十米不在话下；我会找旁边的好心人帮忙，我会用腰带当绳子，我会打110找警察…… > > 其实还有很多的答案，想不想知道各个专业的学生是怎么解救的？一起来看看各专业“大神”们的回答： 材料科学学院 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到今天为止，老师们都已经上了4天班；<\/p>

但是，很遗憾的是，今天还只是周二；<\/p>

还有3天的工作日要过；<\/p>

不过，别哭，<\/p>","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":8,"qid":"2629036","rt_wid":"0","rt_count":"1","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"2","footprint_count":"578","src":"xnw.com<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1476178983","up":"3","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":[{"channel_name":"趣谈","channel_id":"1518386"}],"utime":"1476180280","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":5475,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"1","user":{"id":"31534114","web_icon":"{24ADB08E-B45F-A045-DFCD-6C63419398FA},{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nick":"邢文素老师","pinyin":"XingWenSuLaoShi;XWSLS;邢文素老师","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"邢文素老师","hqid":"2631680","star_value":"0","page_view_count":3,"account":"邢文素老师","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nickname":"邢文素老师","gid":"31534114","never_login":false,"honour":"解元","role":0},"qun":{"id":"2629036","name":"老师们的生活小栈","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7BBB5C469C-CE71-18C7-62FE-DA6993781CE7%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"卷子批不完，事情多如山，怎样才能让老师重新活力满满？\n早起晚归，精神疲惫，老师如何进行自我调理？\n本群各类妙招带老师开启健康新生活。","member_count":"103","type":"0","allow_join":"1","pinyin":"LaoShiMenDeShengHuoXiaoZhan;LSMDSHXZ;老师们的生活小栈","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"1","full_name":"老师们的生活小栈","label_int":3},"channel2tag_list":{"趣谈":"1518386"},"questionnaire":{"end_time":null,"over_time":null,"finish_count":null,"finish":false},"content_cut":"学校老师一天表情大全，主要看气质...不许笑！ 到今天为止，老师们都已经上了4天班； 但是，很遗憾的是，今天还只是周二； 还有3天的工作日要过； 不过，别哭，"},"visit_user_list":[{"id":"32722938","uid":"32722938","vtime":"1633856296","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{8df28efe-9dca-0d75-d00a-ed464c9d2f47}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"雲が甘ぃ","nickname":"阿涵.","remark":"","name":"阿涵."},{"id":"32668406","uid":"32668406","vtime":"1633851173","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{4F989F93-F611-8A88-751A-887083A18008}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"32668406","nickname":"罗祺爸爸","remark":"","name":"罗祺爸爸"},{"id":"32723923","uid":"32723923","vtime":"1633776424","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{FB44F11D-AB46-5C7C-10E6-3337CE33118F}\/s:110x110\/1.png","account":"32723923","nickname":"(。-ω-)zzz","remark":"","name":"(。-ω-)zzz"}],"content_cut":"","allow_modify_material":0,"allow_delete_material":0,"is_short_content":1},{"id":"5881160","uid":"32435975","title":"","content":"","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":0,"qid":"102251","rt_wid":"2580328","rt_count":"0","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"0","footprint_count":"397","src":"安卓手机<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1558357941","up":"1","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":"","utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":11933,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"16","user":{"id":"32435975","web_icon":"{f917411c-d711-b4c9-7596-3d67be4c5eb2},{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nick":"sycき","pinyin":"syc;syc;sycぁ;syc;syc;sycき","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"沈宇辰","hqid":"3607403","star_value":"0","page_view_count":5,"account":"sycぁ","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nickname":"sycき","gid":"32435975","never_login":false,"honour":"举人","role":-1,"is_homepage_enabled":false},"qun":{"id":"102251","name":"开心乐园","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7B00AB9222-E16B-4083-AA74-3CE09078B2A3%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"来吧，童鞋们，让我们每天在这里发一个新笑话，祝大家开心的度过每一天!","member_count":"13165","type":"0","allow_join":3,"pinyin":"KaiXinLeYuan;KXLY;开心乐园","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"0","full_name":"开心乐园","label_int":3},"rt_weibo":{"id":"2580328","uid":"31534114","title":"要周末了 放松下吧","content":"

现在的小盆友<\/span><\/p>

都有逆天的技能<\/span><\/p>

演得了戏，撩得了妹\/汉<\/span><\/p>

比我们小时候彪<\/span><\/p>","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":8,"qid":"2629036","rt_wid":"0","rt_count":"1","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"3","footprint_count":"577","src":"xnw.com<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1477032130","up":"1","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":[{"channel_name":"趣谈","channel_id":"1518386"}],"utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":5607,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"1","user":{"id":"31534114","web_icon":"{24ADB08E-B45F-A045-DFCD-6C63419398FA},{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nick":"邢文素老师","pinyin":"XingWenSuLaoShi;XWSLS;邢文素老师","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"邢文素老师","hqid":"2631680","star_value":"0","page_view_count":3,"account":"邢文素老师","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nickname":"邢文素老师","gid":"31534114","never_login":false,"honour":"解元","role":0},"qun":{"id":"2629036","name":"老师们的生活小栈","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7BBB5C469C-CE71-18C7-62FE-DA6993781CE7%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"卷子批不完，事情多如山，怎样才能让老师重新活力满满？\n早起晚归，精神疲惫，老师如何进行自我调理？\n本群各类妙招带老师开启健康新生活。","member_count":"103","type":"0","allow_join":"1","pinyin":"LaoShiMenDeShengHuoXiaoZhan;LSMDSHXZ;老师们的生活小栈","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"1","full_name":"老师们的生活小栈","label_int":3},"channel2tag_list":{"趣谈":"1518386"},"questionnaire":{"end_time":null,"over_time":null,"finish_count":null,"finish":false},"content_cut":"要周末了 放松下吧 现在的小盆友 都有逆天的技能 演得了戏，撩得了妹\/汉 比我们小时候彪"},"visit_user_list":[{"id":"32722938","uid":"32722938","vtime":"1633856296","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{8df28efe-9dca-0d75-d00a-ed464c9d2f47}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"雲が甘ぃ","nickname":"阿涵.","remark":"","name":"阿涵."},{"id":"32668406","uid":"32668406","vtime":"1633851173","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{4F989F93-F611-8A88-751A-887083A18008}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"32668406","nickname":"罗祺爸爸","remark":"","name":"罗祺爸爸"},{"id":"32723923","uid":"32723923","vtime":"1633776424","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{FB44F11D-AB46-5C7C-10E6-3337CE33118F}\/s:110x110\/1.png","account":"32723923","nickname":"(。-ω-)zzz","remark":"","name":"(。-ω-)zzz"}],"content_cut":"","allow_modify_material":0,"allow_delete_material":0,"is_short_content":1},{"id":"5881155","uid":"32435975","title":"","content":"","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":0,"qid":"102251","rt_wid":"2605823","rt_count":"0","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"0","footprint_count":397,"src":"安卓手机<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1558357920","up":"1","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":"","utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":11807,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"16","user":{"id":"32435975","web_icon":"{f917411c-d711-b4c9-7596-3d67be4c5eb2},{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nick":"sycき","pinyin":"syc;syc;sycぁ;syc;syc;sycき","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"沈宇辰","hqid":"3607403","star_value":"0","page_view_count":5,"account":"sycぁ","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nickname":"sycき","gid":"32435975","never_login":false,"honour":"举人","role":-1,"is_homepage_enabled":false},"qun":{"id":"102251","name":"开心乐园","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7B00AB9222-E16B-4083-AA74-3CE09078B2A3%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"来吧，童鞋们，让我们每天在这里发一个新笑话，祝大家开心的度过每一天!","member_count":"13165","type":"0","allow_join":3,"pinyin":"KaiXinLeYuan;KXLY;开心乐园","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"0","full_name":"开心乐园","label_int":3},"rt_weibo":{"id":"2605823","uid":"31534114","title":"10张小学生试卷：这些孩子都是人才，不服不行！笑了10分钟...","content":"

考试，几乎成为了检验学生学习效果的唯一标准。
<\/p>

为此，出题老师和学生们为了考试，费尽心血，斗智斗勇；<\/p>

在长年累月中，就出现了如下这些让人啼笑皆非的试卷……<\/p>

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\"QQ截图20161104140845.png\"
<\/p>

1、数学老师：由线和面组成的是什么？<\/p>

答：馅和面？饺子呗。<\/p>

（好有道理啊！）<\/p>

\"QQ截图20161104140852.png\"
<\/p>

2、化学老师<\/p><\/img><\/p><\/img><\/p>","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":8,"qid":"2629036","rt_wid":"0","rt_count":"5","comment_count":"1","fav_count":"4","footprint_count":"847","src":"xnw.com<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1478240078","up":"9","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":[{"channel_name":"趣谈","channel_id":"1518386"}],"utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":7157,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"1574644137","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"1","user":{"id":"31534114","web_icon":"{24ADB08E-B45F-A045-DFCD-6C63419398FA},{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nick":"邢文素老师","pinyin":"XingWenSuLaoShi;XWSLS;邢文素老师","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"邢文素老师","hqid":"2631680","star_value":"0","page_view_count":3,"account":"邢文素老师","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nickname":"邢文素老师","gid":"31534114","never_login":false,"honour":"解元","role":0},"qun":{"id":"2629036","name":"老师们的生活小栈","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7BBB5C469C-CE71-18C7-62FE-DA6993781CE7%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"卷子批不完，事情多如山，怎样才能让老师重新活力满满？\n早起晚归，精神疲惫，老师如何进行自我调理？\n本群各类妙招带老师开启健康新生活。","member_count":"103","type":"0","allow_join":"1","pinyin":"LaoShiMenDeShengHuoXiaoZhan;LSMDSHXZ;老师们的生活小栈","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"1","full_name":"老师们的生活小栈","label_int":3},"channel2tag_list":{"趣谈":"1518386"},"questionnaire":{"end_time":null,"over_time":null,"finish_count":null,"finish":false},"content_cut":"老师，对不起！我把您教的都还给您了！ 1、数学老师：由线和面组成的是什么？ 答：馅和面？饺子呗。 （好有道理啊！） 2、化学老师"},"visit_user_list":[{"id":"32722938","uid":"32722938","vtime":"1633856296","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{8df28efe-9dca-0d75-d00a-ed464c9d2f47}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"雲が甘ぃ","nickname":"阿涵.","remark":"","name":"阿涵."},{"id":"32668406","uid":"32668406","vtime":"1633851173","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{4F989F93-F611-8A88-751A-887083A18008}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"32668406","nickname":"罗祺爸爸","remark":"","name":"罗祺爸爸"},{"id":"32723923","uid":"32723923","vtime":"1633776424","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{FB44F11D-AB46-5C7C-10E6-3337CE33118F}\/s:110x110\/1.png","account":"32723923","nickname":"(。-ω-)zzz","remark":"","name":"(。-ω-)zzz"}],"content_cut":"","allow_modify_material":0,"allow_delete_material":0,"is_short_content":1},{"id":"5881151","uid":"32435975","title":"","content":"","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":0,"qid":"102251","rt_wid":"2744563","rt_count":"0","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"0","footprint_count":"393","src":"安卓手机<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1558357885","up":"1","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":"","utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":11708,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"16","user":{"id":"32435975","web_icon":"{f917411c-d711-b4c9-7596-3d67be4c5eb2},{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nick":"sycき","pinyin":"syc;syc;sycぁ;syc;syc;sycき","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"沈宇辰","hqid":"3607403","star_value":"0","page_view_count":5,"account":"sycぁ","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nickname":"sycき","gid":"32435975","never_login":false,"honour":"举人","role":-1,"is_homepage_enabled":false},"qun":{"id":"102251","name":"开心乐园","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7B00AB9222-E16B-4083-AA74-3CE09078B2A3%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"来吧，童鞋们，让我们每天在这里发一个新笑话，祝大家开心的度过每一天!","member_count":"13165","type":"0","allow_join":3,"pinyin":"KaiXinLeYuan;KXLY;开心乐园","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"0","full_name":"开心乐园","label_int":3},"rt_weibo":{"id":"2744563","uid":"31534114","title":"考试得0蛋的孩子，卷子上都写了啥？看一次笑一次！","content":"

其实，比满分更难考的是零分。<\/span>
<\/p>

因为哪怕你写个名字，写个“解”“答”，老师都可能一不小心给了感情分，所以那些有本事抱个“鸭蛋”回家的孩子，答卷必有“过人之处”。<\/p>

比如下面这些熊孩子的表现。<\/p>

以下，是我这辈子见过最耿直的考试答案<\/strong><\/span><\/p>

（最后一个简直了！……）
<\/strong><\/span><\/p>

\"0.gif\"
<\/strong><\/span><\/p>

↓↓↓<\/strong><\/span><\/p><\/span><\/p><\/p><\/p>","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":8,"qid":"2629036","rt_wid":"0","rt_count":"5","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"2","footprint_count":"866","src":"xnw.com<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1481097968","up":"2","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":[{"channel_name":"趣谈","channel_id":"1518386"}],"utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":5891,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"1","user":{"id":"31534114","web_icon":"{24ADB08E-B45F-A045-DFCD-6C63419398FA},{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nick":"邢文素老师","pinyin":"XingWenSuLaoShi;XWSLS;邢文素老师","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"邢文素老师","hqid":"2631680","star_value":"0","page_view_count":3,"account":"邢文素老师","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nickname":"邢文素老师","gid":"31534114","never_login":false,"honour":"解元","role":0},"qun":{"id":"2629036","name":"老师们的生活小栈","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7BBB5C469C-CE71-18C7-62FE-DA6993781CE7%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"卷子批不完，事情多如山，怎样才能让老师重新活力满满？\n早起晚归，精神疲惫，老师如何进行自我调理？\n本群各类妙招带老师开启健康新生活。","member_count":"103","type":"0","allow_join":"1","pinyin":"LaoShiMenDeShengHuoXiaoZhan;LSMDSHXZ;老师们的生活小栈","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"1","full_name":"老师们的生活小栈","label_int":3},"channel2tag_list":{"趣谈":"1518386"},"questionnaire":{"end_time":null,"over_time":null,"finish_count":null,"finish":false},"content_cut":"考试得0蛋的孩子，卷子上都写了啥？看一次笑一次！ 其实，比满分更难考的是零分。 因为哪怕你写个名字，写个“解”“答”，老师都可能一不小心给了感情分，所以那些有本事抱个“鸭蛋”回家的孩子，答卷必有“过人之处”。 比如下面这些熊孩子的表现。 以下，是我这辈子见过最耿直的考试答案 （最后一个简直了！……） ↓↓↓"},"visit_user_list":[{"id":"32722938","uid":"32722938","vtime":"1633856297","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{8df28efe-9dca-0d75-d00a-ed464c9d2f47}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"雲が甘ぃ","nickname":"阿涵.","remark":"","name":"阿涵."},{"id":"32668406","uid":"32668406","vtime":"1633851173","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{4F989F93-F611-8A88-751A-887083A18008}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"32668406","nickname":"罗祺爸爸","remark":"","name":"罗祺爸爸"},{"id":"32723923","uid":"32723923","vtime":"1633776425","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{FB44F11D-AB46-5C7C-10E6-3337CE33118F}\/s:110x110\/1.png","account":"32723923","nickname":"(。-ω-)zzz","remark":"","name":"(。-ω-)zzz"}],"content_cut":"","allow_modify_material":0,"allow_delete_material":0,"is_short_content":1},{"id":"5881149","uid":"32435975","title":"内容如下","content":"","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":0,"qid":"102251","rt_wid":"2785029","rt_count":"0","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"0","footprint_count":"393","src":"安卓手机<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1558357870","up":"1","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":"","utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":11679,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"16","user":{"id":"32435975","web_icon":"{f917411c-d711-b4c9-7596-3d67be4c5eb2},{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nick":"sycき","pinyin":"syc;syc;sycぁ;syc;syc;sycき","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"沈宇辰","hqid":"3607403","star_value":"0","page_view_count":5,"account":"sycぁ","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nickname":"sycき","gid":"32435975","never_login":false,"honour":"举人","role":-1,"is_homepage_enabled":false},"qun":{"id":"102251","name":"开心乐园","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7B00AB9222-E16B-4083-AA74-3CE09078B2A3%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"来吧，童鞋们，让我们每天在这里发一个新笑话，祝大家开心的度过每一天!","member_count":"13165","type":"0","allow_join":3,"pinyin":"KaiXinLeYuan;KXLY;开心乐园","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"0","full_name":"开心乐园","label_int":3},"rt_weibo":{"id":"2785029","uid":"31534114","title":"小学生作文告白李易峰 老师批注“早日醒来”","content":"

\"\"<\/p>

\"\"<\/p>

　　近日，继希望十年后和鹿晗在一起的小学生之后，又一位立志嫁给明星的祖国花朵出现了！有网友曝光了这位小学生的大作，虽然字迹稚嫩，但通篇都洋溢着一股浓浓的偶像剧风情，文末这位“雪儿”还不忘点题，表示自己最大的梦想就是“和我的峰峰一起走到最后”。<\/p>

\"\"<\/p>

　　有趣的是，老师看完此文后用红笔批注称，“愿你早日醒来”，也是醉了。不少网友纷纷笑言“老师给点梦想吧”，更多网友表示“现在的孩子想法不能理解”。(转自新华网)<\/p>

早起晚归，精神疲惫，老师如何进行自我<\/font><\/span><\/p><\/blockquote><\/p><\/p><\/p>","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":8,"qid":"2629036","rt_wid":"0","rt_count":"5","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"0","footprint_count":"848","src":"xnw.com<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1481787653","up":"3","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":[{"channel_name":"趣谈","channel_id":"1518386"}],"utime":"1481787686","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":6062,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"1","user":{"id":"31534114","web_icon":"{24ADB08E-B45F-A045-DFCD-6C63419398FA},{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nick":"邢文素老师","pinyin":"XingWenSuLaoShi;XWSLS;邢文素老师","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"邢文素老师","hqid":"2631680","star_value":"0","page_view_count":3,"account":"邢文素老师","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{331883D0-52A5-4C6F-4CCD-424ECDEB4851}","nickname":"邢文素老师","gid":"31534114","never_login":false,"honour":"解元","role":0},"qun":{"id":"2629036","name":"老师们的生活小栈","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7BBB5C469C-CE71-18C7-62FE-DA6993781CE7%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"卷子批不完，事情多如山，怎样才能让老师重新活力满满？\n早起晚归，精神疲惫，老师如何进行自我调理？\n本群各类妙招带老师开启健康新生活。","member_count":"103","type":"0","allow_join":"1","pinyin":"LaoShiMenDeShengHuoXiaoZhan;LSMDSHXZ;老师们的生活小栈","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"1","full_name":"老师们的生活小栈","label_int":3},"channel2tag_list":{"趣谈":"1518386"},"questionnaire":{"end_time":null,"over_time":null,"finish_count":null,"finish":false},"content_cut":"小学生作文告白李易峰 老师批注“早日醒来” 近日，继希望十年后和鹿晗在一起的小学生之后，又一位立志嫁给明星的祖国花朵出现了！有网友曝光了这位小学生的大作，虽然字迹稚嫩，但通篇都洋溢着一股浓浓的偶像剧风情，文末这位“雪儿”还不忘点题，表示自己最大的梦想就是“和我的峰峰一起走到最后”。 有趣的是，老师看完此文后用红笔批注称，“愿你早日醒来”，也是醉了。不少网友纷纷笑言“老师给点梦想吧”，更多网友表示“现在的孩子想法不能理解”。(转自新华网) > 早起晚归，精神疲惫，老师如何进行自我"},"visit_user_list":[{"id":"32722938","uid":"32722938","vtime":"1633856297","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{8df28efe-9dca-0d75-d00a-ed464c9d2f47}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"雲が甘ぃ","nickname":"阿涵.","remark":"","name":"阿涵."},{"id":"32668406","uid":"32668406","vtime":"1633851173","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{4F989F93-F611-8A88-751A-887083A18008}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"32668406","nickname":"罗祺爸爸","remark":"","name":"罗祺爸爸"},{"id":"32723923","uid":"32723923","vtime":"1633776425","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{FB44F11D-AB46-5C7C-10E6-3337CE33118F}\/s:110x110\/1.png","account":"32723923","nickname":"(。-ω-)zzz","remark":"","name":"(。-ω-)zzz"}],"content_cut":"内容如下","allow_modify_material":0,"allow_delete_material":0,"is_short_content":1},{"id":"5881075","uid":"32435975","title":"那些年被父母的坑。","content":"小时候回家和爸妈说老师让带一把豆子,第二天带着一把豆子去了结果是开运动会，每人带一把凳子。所以站着看完了运动会 


真事，我幼儿园时，老师让我们每人带一把刀来削铅笔，第二天，有个小男生从他的牛仔布背包里抽出一把生了锈的大菜刀


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地理老师：你自己看看这次他们的试卷吧，我国五大名山之首是（赵本山），最著名的江是（潘长江），我国的煤都是（黑的），我国的铁都是（硬的），你说我还怎么上课？

语文老师：上课的时候，有个同学在看杂志，我没收了他的杂志敲了敲他脑袋……可是在我转身准备继续上课的时候，他的同桌竟然哈哈大笑了起来，搞得课都上不下去。我就问他为什么笑，你知道他是怎么答我的？那小子从抽屉里掏出一本辞海，竟然这样对我说：“老师，你还好没发现","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":5,"qid":"102251","rt_wid":"0","rt_count":"1","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"1","footprint_count":"396","src":"安卓手机<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1558357345","up":"2","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":"","utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":11833,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"16","user":{"id":"32435975","web_icon":"{f917411c-d711-b4c9-7596-3d67be4c5eb2},{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nick":"sycき","pinyin":"syc;syc;sycぁ;syc;syc;sycき","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"沈宇辰","hqid":"3607403","star_value":"0","page_view_count":5,"account":"sycぁ","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nickname":"sycき","gid":"32435975","never_login":false,"honour":"举人","role":-1,"is_homepage_enabled":false},"qun":{"id":"102251","name":"开心乐园","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7B00AB9222-E16B-4083-AA74-3CE09078B2A3%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"来吧，童鞋们，让我们每天在这里发一个新笑话，祝大家开心的度过每一天!","member_count":"13165","type":"0","allow_join":3,"pinyin":"KaiXinLeYuan;KXLY;开心乐园","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"0","full_name":"开心乐园","label_int":3},"visit_user_list":[{"id":"32722938","uid":"32722938","vtime":"1633856297","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{8df28efe-9dca-0d75-d00a-ed464c9d2f47}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"雲が甘ぃ","nickname":"阿涵.","remark":"","name":"阿涵."},{"id":"32668406","uid":"32668406","vtime":"1633851173","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{4F989F93-F611-8A88-751A-887083A18008}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","account":"32668406","nickname":"罗祺爸爸","remark":"","name":"罗祺爸爸"},{"id":"32723923","uid":"32723923","vtime":"1633776425","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{FB44F11D-AB46-5C7C-10E6-3337CE33118F}\/s:110x110\/1.png","account":"32723923","nickname":"(。-ω-)zzz","remark":"","name":"(。-ω-)zzz"}],"content_cut":"那群学生真的没办法教了☆♂历史老师：那群学生真的没办法教了，上课的时候我提问题 ：“你们知道武则天是什么人吗？”第一个同学回答我说他和她不熟，第二个同学回答我说是他的一个网友，第三个同学说他有她的QQ号码等下课了上QQ问一下……还一个同学竟然掏出手机说要马上问她。 地理老师：你自己看看这次他们的试卷吧，我国五大名山之首是（赵本山），最著名的江是（潘长江），我国的煤都是（黑的），我国的铁都是（硬的），你说我还怎么上课？ 语文老师：上课的时候，有个同学在看杂志，我没收了他的杂志敲了敲他脑袋……可是在我转身准备继续…","allow_modify_material":0,"allow_delete_material":0,"is_short_content":0},{"id":"5881013","uid":"32435975","title":"","content":"","pic":"","pic_wxh":"","is_long":0,"qid":"102251","rt_wid":"3222853","rt_count":"0","comment_count":"0","fav_count":"0","footprint_count":"328","src":"安卓手机<\/a>","status":"1","ctime":"1558357207","up":"1","pic_count":"0","vote":"0","type":"0","channel_list":"","utime":"0","receiver_total":"0","forbid_comment":"0","forbid_rt":"0","is_special_rt":"0","public":"0","page_view_count":11529,"cover_url":"","perfect":"0","comment_time":"0","is_zp":"0","orig_src":"16","user":{"id":"32435975","web_icon":"{f917411c-d711-b4c9-7596-3d67be4c5eb2},{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nick":"sycき","pinyin":"syc;syc;sycぁ;syc;syc;sycき","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}\/s:110x110\/1.jpg","realname":"沈宇辰","hqid":"3607403","star_value":"0","page_view_count":5,"account":"sycぁ","mobile":"","icon_filed_id":"{332cb90e-aecc-2ce6-3156-112b282c2e65}","nickname":"sycき","gid":"32435975","never_login":false,"honour":"举人","role":-1,"is_homepage_enabled":false},"qun":{"id":"102251","name":"开心乐园","icon":"https:\/\/cdn.xnwimg.com\/down\/f:%7B00AB9222-E16B-4083-AA74-3CE09078B2A3%7D\/s:180x180\/1.jpg","label":"其他","description":"来吧，童鞋们，让我们每天在这里发一个新笑话，祝大家开心的度过每一天!","member_count":"13165","type":"0","allow_join":3,"pinyin":"KaiXinLeYuan;KXLY;开心乐园","disable_qun_chat":"0","has_open_channel":"1","indentity":0,"grade":"","school_qid":"0","student_count":"0","class_id":"0","is_forum_mode":"0","full_name":"开心乐园","label_int":3},"rt_weibo":{"id":"3222853","uid":"31534114","title":"古代文人用上互联网会是什么样？","content":"

假如古人用上朋友圈
<\/p>

那会是怎样的一番情形？<\/p>

\"640.webp\"640.webp\"640.webp.jpg\"<\/p>

假如他们用上微博，<\/span><\/p>

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假如古人用上朋友圈 那会是怎样的一番情形？ 假如他们用上微博， 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　优秀
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老师都很严肃吗？<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/p>

no！<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/p>

那是你没见过这些萌萌哒、可爱的老师！<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/p>

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